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Letter "A" » Ambrose Bierce Quotes


«AMBITION, n. An overmastering desire to be vilified by enemies while living and made ridiculous by friends when dead.»
«It has been observed that one's nose is never so happy as when it is thrust into the affairs of another, from which some physiologists have drawn the inference that the nose is devoid of the sense of smell.»
«Liar, n.: A lawyer with a roving commission.»
«ABILITY, n. The natural equipment to accomplish some small part of the meaner ambitions distinguishing able men from dead ones. In the last analysis ability is commonly found to consist mainly in a high degree of solemnity. Perhaps, however, this impressive quality is rightly appraised; it is no easy task to be solemn.»
«ABNORMAL, adj. Not conforming to standard. In matters of thought and conduct, to be independent is to be abnormal, to be abnormal is to be detested. Wherefore the lexicographer adviseth a striving toward the straiter [sic] resemblance of the Average Man than he hath to himself. Whoso attaineth thereto shall have peace, the prospect of death and the hope of Hell.»
«ABATIS, n. Rubbish in front of a fort, to prevent the rubbish outside from molesting the rubbish inside.»
«ABDICATION, n. An act whereby a sovereign attests his sense of the high temperature of the throne.Poor Isabella's Dead, whose abdication Set all tongues wagging in the Spanish nation. For that performance 'twere unfair to scold her: She wisely left a throne too hot to hold her. To History she'll be no royal riddle -- Merely a plain parched pea that jumped the griddle. --G.J.»
«Abscond. To ''move'' in a mysterious way, commonly with the property of another.»
«Admiral. That part of a warship which does the talking while the figurehead does the thinking.»
«The gambling known as business looks with austere disfavor upon the business known as gambling.»

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